Christian one liners

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Don’t let your worries get the best of you; Remember, Moses started out as a basket case. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited
Until you try to sit in their pews.
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Many folks want to serve God,
But only as advisers.

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It is easier to preach ten sermons
Than it is to live one.

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The good Lord didn’t create anything without a purpose,
But mosquitoes come close.

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When you get to your wit’s end,
You’ll find God lives there.

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People are funny; they want the front of the bus,
Middle of the road,
And back of the church.

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Opportunity may knock once,
But temptation bangs on the front door forever.

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Quit griping about your church;
If it was perfect, you couldn’t belong.

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If a church wants a better pastor,
It only needs to pray for the one it has.

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We’re called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.

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God Himself doesn’t propose to judge a man until
he is dead. So why should you?

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Some minds are like concrete
Thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

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Peace starts with a smile.

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I don’t know why some people change churches;
What difference does it make which one you stay home from?

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Be ye fishers of men. You catch ‘em – He’ll clean ‘em.

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Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.

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Don’t put a question mark where God put a period.

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Don’ t wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.

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Forbidden fruits create many jams.

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God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

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God grades on the cross, not the curve.

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God loves everyone,
But probably prefers ‘fruits of the spirit’ over ‘religious nuts!’

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God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

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He who angers you, controls you!

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If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!

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Prayer:
Don’t give God instructions, just report for duty!

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The task ahead of us is never as
great as the Power behind us.

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The Will of God never takes you to where the
Grace of God will not protect you.

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We don’t change the message,
The message changes us.

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You can tell how big a person is
By what it takes to discourage him/her.

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The best mathematical equation I have ever seen:
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

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If this blessed you in a profound way today,
Share it with a few friends to bless them!
I bet someone else will LOVE it too.
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There is no greater treasure than a good friend!

DEFINITION OF “Service”

I became confused when I heard the word

“Service” being used with these agencies:

1. Internal Revenue “Service”

2. Postal “Service”

3. Telephone “Service”

4. Cable T.V. “Service”

5. Civil “Service”

6. Provincial, City, County & Public “Service”

7. Customer

“Service”

This is not what I thought

“Service” meant.

But today I overheard two farmers talking, and one

of them said he had hired a bull to

“Service” a few cows.

BAM !!! It all came into focus.

Now I understand what all those agencies are doing!

A great message

THIS TURNED OUT TO BE SO DIFFERENT FROM WHAT I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE.. IT IS A WONDERFUL MESSAGE!!

Once upon a time there was a girl who had four friends.

She loved the fourth friend the most and adorned him with rich robes and treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but the best.

She also loved the third friend very much and was always showing him off to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would leave her for another.

She also loved her second friend. He was her confidant and was always kind, considerate and patient with her. Whenever this girl faced a problem, she could confide in him, and he would help her get through the difficult times.

The girl’s first friend was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth and kingdom. However, she did not love the first friend, although he loved her deeply, she hardly took notice of him!

One day, the girl fell ill and she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life and wondered, ‘I now have four friends with me, but when I die, will I be alone.’

Thus, she asked the fourth friend, ‘I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I’m dying, will you follow me and keep me company?
‘No way!’, replied the fourth friend, and he walked away without another word.

His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart.

The sad girl then asked the third friend, ‘I loved you all my life. Now that I’m dying, will you follow me and keep me company?’ ‘No!’, replied the third friend. ‘Life is too good! When you die, I’m going to marry someone else!’ Her heart sank and turned cold.

She then asked the second friend, ‘I have always turned to you for help and you’ve always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?’

‘I’m sorry, I can’t help you out this time!’, replied the second friend. ‘At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave.’
His answer struck her like a bolt of lightning, and the girl was devastated.

Then a voice called out: ‘I’ll go with you. I’ll follow you no matter where you go.’ The girl looked up, and there was her first friend. He was very skinny as he suffered from malnutrition and neglect.

Greatly grieved, the girl said, ‘I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!’

In truth, you have four friends in your lives:

Your fourth friend is your body . No matter how much time and effort you lavish in making it look good, it will leave you when you die.

Your third friend is your possessions , status and wealth. When you die, it will all go to others.

Your second friend is your family and friends . No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave.

And your first friend is your spirit . Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world.

However, your spirit is the only thing that will follow you wherever you go. Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of you that will follow you to the throne of God and continue with you throughout Eternity.

Thought for the day: Remember, when the world pushes you to your knees, you’re in the perfect position to pray.

Pass this on to someone you care about – I just did.

Being happy doesn’t mean everything’s perfect. It means you’ve decided to see beyond the imperfections.